Mindsets

The Serve and Limit of Social Comparison

August 24, 2018

Maggie, a counsellor, saw a client in the morning who related how his doctor had just given him a diagnosis of cancer, necessitating cutting out some cancerous tissue. Her client, Arnold, was dismayed about the diagnosis. “But at least,” he confided to Maggie, “I don’t have to have that horrible colostomy bag like some people do.” »

Building Shame Resilience in Clients

June 1, 2018

Jungian analysts have called it the “swampland of the soul”. Other psychotherapy writers have observed how it originally served to keep us safe; the tendency to shame has been a universal one in which our desire to hide our flaws from others has saved us from being kicked out of the group (the society), which evolutionarily would have meant death (Sholl, 2013). So which is it? Is shame totally pat... »

Shame, Guilt, Humiliation, and Embarrassment

May 29, 2018

Shame, guilt, humiliation, and embarrassment are painful and universal human experiences; the terms are often used interchangeably and do overlap, but are different from one another. Owing to differences in culture, religion, ethics, and personal standards, we experience them differently to even similar others in our social sphere, and certainly to people in other cultures. In this post and a foll... »

Adapting to Different Client Mindsets

May 22, 2009

When communicating with clients, flexibility and responsiveness are two of the most beneficial skills a counsellor can have. Different mindsets and emotional states require a particular approach; and the counsellor’s ability to adjust to a client’s needs normally dictates the outcome of that relationship. In order to better exemplify the diversity of mindsets which clients may approach... »

Coping Effectively with Change: Carla’s Case Study

February 8, 2008

Carla is a 37 year old woman who works as a manager in a large engineering firm. She is married with two children a boy aged 10 (Carlos) and girl aged 8 (Anna). Her husband Rodrigo is great with the kids and very devoted and loving to Carla but he has recently been laid off from work (clothing factory supervisor) because the company became liquidated and folded. »

Effective Options to Cope with Change

February 5, 2008

Experience and the literature inform us that transitions or changes in life are inevitable and you can fight them, flee from them or preferably accept that you need to prepare for and adapt to the changes in some way. Having confidence in being able to plan for and adapt to change, by having skills and knowledge that you know will work, by building resilience so that you have the emotional strengt... »

Ineffective Options to Cope with Change

February 4, 2008

It is a bit difficult to define ineffective options simply because it is easier to describe those situations where people have ineffective options to react to change. »

Change: Understanding Feelings and Emotions

January 29, 2008

Obviously there may be many different feelings and emotions that a person could experience depending on the situation or circumstances. One person may fear change whilst another may revel in it and enjoy the challenges. A child about to enter early adolescence may also have a sense of fear or anxiety about what changes to expect, embarrassment about bodily changes, heightened sexual desires and bo... »

Positive Aspects of Change

January 24, 2008

People often avoid change; opting for predictability and control, rather than the more stoic, flowing style of embracing life’s challenges. But life is a dynamic balance of negatives and positives, and focusing on the positive aspects of change can be the difference between growing under duress and thriving in any environment, or experiencing continuing stress and anxiety. Let’s explor... »